September 26, 2022

By God! Legislators take a stand, so that Jesus won’t return and find gay marriage!

Newly elected Christian Right legislators gathered in the Texas Capitol Building’s auditorium today, and vowed to defend marriage from LGBT couples. No mention of a lesbian couple that a judge allowed to marry, because of life threatening circumstances. You bet your bippy, they will put a stop to that though!

A cake to celebrate the 10 year anniversary of Texas's gay marriage ban. A banner day for Jesus!
A cake to celebrate the 10 year anniversary of Texas’s gay marriage ban. A banner day for Jesus!

“I don’t know if the end days are today, or a thousand years from now,” Patrick (Lt. Governor) told the crowd. “That’s why we have to stand for Christ in all that we do.”

“A pastor—one of the so-called Houston Five who’ve been involved in a fight with Houston mayor Annise Parker—delivered a closing prayer: “We declare this state to be the sovereign territory of Jesus Christ,” he said, eliciting “amens” from the crowd.”http://www.texasobserver.org/at-the-capitol-a-last-stand-a…/

“The sanctity of marriage wasn’t the only subject on the day’s agenda. State Rep. Matt Krause (R-Fort Worth) rose to speak about his efforts to curb judicial bypass abortions. A slick lawyer could abduct your daughter on her way to school, he told attendees, and help her get an abortion without your knowledge.”

One thing is for sure they may not fully fund public education, but they sure as hell will prevent LGBT couples from marrying and as many women as possible from getting a safe and legal abortion or access to reproductive health services.

What’s that you say? You didn’t vote for homophobia and theocracy? If you voted Republican in Texas and elsewhere (Kansas, ahem…) that is exactly what you are going to get! If you didn’t vote, and you didn’t have access problems, thanks for nothing.

13 thoughts on “By God! Legislators take a stand, so that Jesus won’t return and find gay marriage!

  1. A slick lawyer could abduct your daughter on her way to school, he told attendees, and help her get an abortion without your knowledge.”

    … the fuck?

      1. Accusations of death panels are beginning to seem rational, relatively speaking. Is that the long-term game-plan for the Republican Party? Future insanity to make last year’s insanity look less insane?

  2. Jesus called and said “no thanks” to your offer of Texas as his sovereign territory. And isn’t it treason or something to offer a huge percentage of American land to a foreign king? If he changes his mind, can he at least pay a few trillion dollars for it?

    But seriously, if all this fundentalist stuff is true, isn’t the world supposed to be pretty much run by Satan when Jesus comes back? The worse (from their point of view) things get, the closer to the last days they are and then everything will soon be perfect! Why fight it? If Jesus can come back to see everyone worshiping Damien or whatever, he’s not going to have a heart attack from seeing gay marriage, too.

    That cake freaks me out–celebrating the anniversary of a human rights abuse by eating a giant, sinister looking cake. If I ever do anything really bad, I’ll observe that tradition, too.

  3. I agree with Narf @ 1 – WTF?

    “A slick lawyer could abduct your daughter on her way to school, he told attendees, and help her get an abortion without your knowledge.”

    Is that a thing in Texas?

    Are there a lot of “slick lawyers” driving around Texas looking for pregnant girls to help get an abortion for?

  4. @1 & @3

    But that can only happen if they have lots of money for plane tickets cuz aren’t all the abortion clinics closed down in Texas???

  5. it is unreal how delusional these people are… the go on and on about how much they want everybody to follow the consitution until it is counter to what they want.

    thanks for letting those who sit on their azz on election day that they are part of the problem.

    there is no doubt about it, if they could, if we allow it, these fundies will built our nation into a theocracy and the “moderate” theists will go along with them just like the sheepel they are…..

    wake up folks, its not just texazz… this garbage is coming to your neighborhood if it is not there already ….

    got off the couch and VOTE!!!

    1. I’d say over half of the states, yeah. Particularly since the redder states are the bigger, emptier ones, we have more crazy states than sane, by pure state-count.

  6. A slick lawyer could abduct your daughter on her way to school, he told attendees, and help her get an abortion without your knowledge.

    It’s pretty sad when a “slick lawyer” cares more about your daughter than you do. Hey! Wait a minute! You have a pregnant daughter exploring abortion option while going to school? You have utterly failed as a Christian parent if you have a daughter getting pregnant out of wedlock and ignoring the sanctity of human life by getting an abortion for basic birth control. Maybe you should bury your head in the Good Book and focus your energy on your own problems and leave the rest of us to deal with the world.

  7. But there’s some good news from Texas: Annise Parker is still mayor of Houston. So sad she will be term limited out next election. Houston is the biggest city in the world that has ever had a lesbian mayor, and most people in Houston do not care. LOL Wut? was pretty much what most of Houston thought back when she first became mayor.

    The recent petition to put the recent LGBT non-discrimination law up to a city wide referendum was thrown out of court as invalid.

    Something similar happened in 1985 when Houston had its first LGBT protection bill. I remember this well as I was 18 and this was the first time I ever voted. Mayor Kathy Whitmire had led the council to vote in favor of broad LGBT protections, and the law passed. But a petition drive brought repeal of the law to a public vote in Nov ’85. Former mayor Louie Welch entered the mayoral race along with a group of candidates running for council seats who called themselves the Straight Slate. You have to remember back then Houston had the 4th highest rate of AIDS infections and held the #2 spot for total AIDS numbers for a few months in 1984. Dark days indeed.

    Sounds like a recipe for dystopia. While the LGBT rights bill lost in the referendum, Whitmire won without facing runoff. Louie Welch is now known more as a joke candidate than for what he did for Houston in the late 60’s, and only one of the Straight Slate candidates ended up on the council.

    BTW, if you’ve seen Tootsie you should be aware that Dustin Hoffman’s character was based on Kathy Whitmire.

  8. @lordn #3:

    Are there a lot of “slick lawyers” driving around Texas looking for pregnant girls to help get an abortion for?

    That would be a particularly scuzzy variation on ambulance-chasing. Which explains why it probably only exists in the mind of Republican politician.

  9. Those buffoons need a new name, and I have one: CHRISIS

    They are the sordid sort who support and want to increase the number of “executions” (read: state murders), who label women “murderers” for having a miscarriage. want to legalize hate, violence and discrimination against LGBTQ peope, and say nothing when black people are dragged to their deaths behind pickup trucks. How are they any different than ISIS in the middle east except how they go about things?

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